How Do You Know When It’s Worth It?

Usually, when it comes to food, I weigh the deliciousness factor against the caloric transgression and make an informed decision about whether I want to “go there.” Sadly, my standards are low and I generally go with “yes.” So, when it comes to a relationship, how do you make the judgment call? It can’t be about calories or taste (unless it’s a REALLY interesting relationship). I guess it comes down to pro’s and con’s and return on emotional investment.

Funny thing about social networking is that it has gotten me back in touch with a lot of people I had lost touch with earlier in my life. Some are people with whom I share a lot in common. Old high school friends with whom I empathize over the challenges of child rearing, or people who I look to for advice. Some of them are people who I find myself amused by but with whom I have no real deep connection. In the past week I have found myself wondering if there isn’t a good reason why some people drift out of our lives and if it’s always a good thing that they pop back up again.

I have been struggling to figure out how to sort through the people with whom I have re-connected on facebook and other social networking sites, and how to assimilate them more appropriately into my real life, if at all. My friends, the real ones, the ones who really know me, know that I value the relationships in my life. I will do anything for a friend and in return, I have friends who do the same for me. They may be people I play with on facebook to escape the harsh realities of  a bad economy, oil spills, tsunamis and nuclear disasters, but they are also people in whom I confide when I am sad, with whom I celebrate when I am happy and for whom I genuinely care. The greatest truth about my friendships is that there are few boundaries. The people with whom I share my true self are people who do not have many boundaries for themselves. My feeling on sharing is that it’s a two-way street and I don’t enjoy feeling like there are so many limits on intimacy that we never delve beneath the surface. I believe friendship and the sharing that goes on within the confines of a friendship are limitless.

“I’m rubber, you’re glue” Remember that schoolyard taunt? Well, for me, in the case of true friendship, “I’m rubber, you’re rubber.” Like the two mirrors placed opposite each other creating an endless series of images reflected back at each other, I feel like true friends synergize each other and propel each other forward. And that’s how you know it’s worth it.